of course you know this.

it's saturday morning.

i'm listening to death cab and letting my mind do what it does best:

over-think.

i let it stretch from the very beginning

to the days to come;

both sets are blurry.

i wonder when i became a winter

when i swore that i was always a fall.

i wonder what you prefer.

probably a summer or spring.

i was never a girl that looked good in pink

or was able to depend on her looks to spark someone's interest.

it involves more work,

but in the end,

doesn't that involve more substance?

today i thought of a mantra

something new to hold on to

something true that i always seem to forget.

do you love yourself?

do you think you're worthy?

then darling, why would you ever allow someone else to question it?

this would be easy if i could pretend that there wasn't someone out there for both of us.

but i know there is.

and yes, we'll find them

but in the mean time, i wish i could have something to hold on to.

when did we get so old?